Another rumor.

 the other rumor going around about him is that he jumped ship in Morocco and teamed up with a disgruntled former bar owner and a Casablanca policeman that was on the lam. They reportedly left Morocco for Sidi Bel Abbes, Algeria where the French officer made a living with his French credentials shaking down transients using his Moroccan credentials. 

Rick the bar owner and Gerard both joined the French Foreign Legion.

Shortly afterwards Rick the former bar owner got news his old girlfriend had been dumped by her husband, Laslo. Rick promptly deserted and left Gerard stuck alone in the Legion.

Gerard was sent to an outlying fort that was besieged by Rifs. The ensuing battle found Gerard decorated with the Legion of Honor for shooting 38 consecutive Rifs off of the back of a camel.

However this recently has been reviewed and the Legion of Honor has been rescinded because the claim has been considered doubtful as nobody has ever figured out how anyone can get 38 people on the back of a camel.

After his enlistment expired he returned to the United States, moved to Alaska and commercial fished for several years before settling in Pennsylvania. There he took on a job running tank vessels moving gasoline and diesel fuel all over creation.

According to some guy  in a bar, Gerard is still working at the trade even though he was eligible for retirement several years ago. It is said he keeps working just to be a pain in the ass and keep some young guy from getting ahead.

The bartender also reports that he is nearing mandatory retirement age and the neighborhood is bracing for him being home full time because he drinks copious amounts of bourbon and howls at the moon. He also enjoys supplying the neighborhood kids with BB guns, paint, slingshots and fireworks.

Currently  he is sitting aboard a tank vessel with a long face because he has nowhere to go having been kicked out of every bar and brothel in the San Francisco Tenderloin district.

It is a Sunday morning and I have nothing to do so I figured I'd preach a little gospel.

Today's sermon is aimed at you younger people that are slugging it out getting a degree or serving an apprenticeship.

Of course, by now someone has offered you a job making more than you are now and it's tempting.

Don't take it. Finish what you have started and see it through.

Of course, that is unless you are chasing a major in something stupid like puppetry. In that case, change majors and get your ticket punched in something useful

Stick with it, it WILL be worth it!

Repent and be saved!!

If you have already repented, please disregard this notice.

If not, send $49.95 and a bottle of Jim Beam to Father Piccolo's ministry and we'll get you started on the way to true enlightenment. 

But wait, there's MORE! If you take advantage of this special one-time offer, we'll throw in free of charge, Eternal Salvation!

Act now! Operators are standing by!

For years I have wondered about televangelists and their followings and wondered. Over the years they seem to have popped up and a number of them have done an outstanding job of keeping the tabloids in business.

Seems pretty profitable to me.

When you look at them there are few that really seem to be serving the deity. Most of them seem to be serving up a pile of hoople disguised as religion that they sell the gullible.

Personally, I can say that Father Piccolo hasn't been inside a church in decades and yet has had more religious experiences at sea than I can count.

I suppose maybe you don't have to have a church to be religious.
I also figure that if there are a few bucks in it and I can get someone to sponser me I would set up a televangical show and get out there and rant and rave.

The difference between me and most of the other televangelists is that I would make most of the show for entertainmant only and be up front about it.

I'd also end with a more serious note and try and help the poor guy that's out there busting his butt every day but never seems to get anywhere but further into debt and depression.

Keep plugging. It's worth it.

What's more, YOU are worth it.

So here's today's sermon.

Just take a few minutes out today and do something for someone else.

Visit an older relative, help a neighbor out with something, whatever.

Just spend a few minutes doing something for someone else and see if it doesn't make you day go a little better.

Sunday sneaked up on me and I have to whip up a sermon

Good Morning!

Glad you are here to enjoy another day no matter what your faith. Even if you don't have one.

SOme of you have woken up not feeling too good and likely you had a little too much fun last night and you're paying for it. I had many Sunday mornings like that in my youth and early middle age so you ain't the Lone Ranger.

Anyway, no matter how you feel now, you'll feel even better if you get out and enjoy the day.

Happy Sunday morning!

It is Sunday

and time for something a little uplifting, or at least positive.

I suppose if you want something really uplifting you can see what the Playtex people have to offer.

I'll just try and be a little upbeat.

If you are down on your luck these days don't let it get to you, just find a way to contribute. Most likely there are a lot of people that are a lot worse off than you are.

If there's a VA hospital drop in and visit the wounded warriors there. You don't have to go from room to room, just drop in on a day room or some other recreational area and hang out a while.

After a while the guys will approach you.

Pick up some trash on the side of the road or in a local park.

Fix something that's broken.

Just get off of you ass and do something for someone else.

You'll be surprised at how good it makes you feel.

Happy Sunday morning.

Just an interesting thought.

A guy I know has a brother that is somewhat of a pain in the ass because he is a hard core bible thumper but even a blind squirrel finds a nut every once in a while.

He met two atheists that were belligerent and asked them both about their atheism. Both said they were total atheists.

"So you don't mind if I pray for your eternal damnation," he said and folded his hands and bowed his head.

One of the two guys stood there with a look of scorn on his face and the other one grew very nervous and showed it.

The thumper raised his head and said to the man with a look of scorn, "You really ARE an atheist."

He then pointed at the other guy, "And you are NOT an atheist!"

Just some Sunday food for thought